The journey begins when you make the decision to go.....

The journey begins when you make the decision to go.

Since last August, I have been looking- searching- for some way to be alone with God for an extended period. To get away from daily life for longer than a weekend retreat or a 1-2 week missions trip.  No daily distractions, not doing things for anyone, not having to be anywhere.  Don't get me wrong, I love doing things for people, especially the ones I love.  It's what God created me to to do.. serve others. But I can also feel Him pulling me to some alone time to REALLY hear what He has in store for me.  Where He has me serving and ministering next.  What steps I need to take to follow in His will for my life.

I knew I needed to go somewhere where I could "be still" with God (Ps 46:10) to figure out where He wants me to go next in my life.  I've felt Him call me to ministry since I was little and I find myself lost without a current full time ministry. My ministry of raising and teaching my children is about over.  They are grown and  Life and God are their teachers now and I just have to let go. I can give them grace, forgiveness, and unconditional love as they tread the minefield of adult life, and let them learn from the consequences of their decisions. I have the church I serve part time, and the homeless ministry once or twice a month, but I know God is calling me to something in addition to that, but I have no idea right now what that is or what it will look like in my life.

Since my mid-20s I've not been in the greatest health.  Back problems, torn ligaments, serious allergy issues, thyroid and anemia problems, asthma, and most recently major joint pain have kept me from doing so many things.  God has certainly taught me so much in all that.  Perseverance and patience. He has led me to many things that have helped like an awesome doctor who gets to the root of a problem rather than fixing the symptoms, incredible information on the internet, and caring friends and family.  I have overcome many physical problems with medication, diet (not eating what I'm allergic to, like wheat and sugar), and exercise; lost over 30 pounds; and have become healthy and strong again.  Now that I'm free of many of my physical ailments and limitations, I also need time to learn more about myself and what I can accomplish.  How far can I be pushed to grow physically, mentally, and spiritually.

In April, I happened upon a movie called "The Way."  Emilio Estevez wrote it for his dad, Martin Sheen, because Martin had always wanted to walk the Camino de Santiago, or The Way of St. James.  I had never heard of the Camino but the movie intrigued me.  The Way is an old pilgrimage route from France through Spain, walked for over 1200 years.  Before that it was a Roman Road. Even more intriguing.  I LOVE history.  The movie was excellent and I recommend it.  For me, though, it is the beginning of my journey.

After not being able to get the Camino off my mind at all, I began to do some research and praying.  I thoroughly feel that this is what God is calling me to do.  This is the answer to my searching.  I began journaling consistently for the first time in my life and beginning the process of preparing myself mind, body, and spirit to go.  I talked with my pastor, who is totally stoked for me, and a few other people who are my spiritual mentors to confirm that this was the right decision.  Within a short time I made my decision.  I'm going on a pilgrimage!

The journey has already begun.. Deciding, preparing, praying, and talking about this adventure have done wonders already in my life.  The support I get from hubby and the kids is a particularly special thing- especially from Ed.  God is already working on me, my relationships, and the way I see and interact with the world around me.